A couple of weeks ago, I spent the day at a beautiful retreat venue in Alcobaça. We had come together to capture the launch of two projects that had been quietly evolving behind the scenes: a beautiful new retreat venue and the second Autumn Series, the culmination of months of planning, careful refinement and bringing together a wonderful team of practitioners.
On the surface, it was simply a photoshoot. We wanted to capture the feeling of the weekend rather than just the venue itself. Nothing overly posed or polished, just people talking, laughing, wandering through the gardens and enjoying each other’s company. Like most things that appear effortless, there was plenty of planning behind the scenes. Different spaces to use, ideas to capture, timings to consider and, throughout it all, our photographer quietly weaving everything together through his eye for light, composition and those fleeting moments that can never be staged.
At the beginning there was the usual uncertainty that seems to appear whenever a camera comes out. People weren’t uncomfortable exactly, just a little aware of themselves. There was the inevitable question of where to stand, what to do with your hands and whether you were smiling too much or not enough.
So, before we started, I simply said, “Relax. Take your time. Enjoy yourselves. There isn’t anything to get right.” And then we got on with the day.
It wasn’t something anyone kept repeating. In fact, I don’t think any of us gave those words another thought. Yet somewhere between that first conversation and the end of the afternoon, something had changed. People stopped noticing the camera. Conversations became easier, laughter became genuine and the photographs gradually stopped looking like photographs. They became snapshots of people simply enjoying themselves.
Driving home that evening, I realised why the day had stayed with me and it made me wonder how often anyone actually says that to us in everyday life. The words “enjoy yourselves” lingered with me long after the day had finished. They carried far more weight than I’d realised at the time because they weren’t really about the photoshoot. They were about something else entirely.
Permission.
And it made me wonder how often any of us are given that.
How often does somebody tell us to slow down, stop trying quite so hard or simply enjoy where we are? Somewhere along the way, many of us seem to have learnt that enjoyment has to be earned. We tell ourselves we’ll relax when the work is finished, celebrate when everything is done or make time for ourselves once life finally becomes less busy. Yet life has an extraordinary habit of moving the finish line.
The more I reflected, the more I understood the quiet shift that happens when people no longer feel they have to perform. Without even noticing, shoulders soften, conversations deepen and people become more themselves. Not because they’ve learnt a new technique, but because, for a little while, they’ve stopped carrying the weight of having to be anything other than who they already are.
As I’ve continued preparing for the Autumn Series, I’ve realised that perhaps this is what I’ve really been creating all along. Of course there are workshops to plan and meals to organise, but underneath all of that is something much simpler: a place where people can arrive, put life down for a while, breathe, move, create and rest without feeling they have to get anything right.
Perhaps that’s what giving yourself permission really means. It isn’t waiting for life to slow down or for someone else to tell you it’s okay. Perhaps it’s simply recognising that you don’t have to earn the right to enjoy this moment.
What would change if, just for today, you gave yourself permission to enjoy your life exactly as it is?
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If this reflection resonated with you, perhaps the Autumn Series is where your own journey begins: Connect, Courage, Create and Calm, creating space to slow down, reconnect and simply be.
🍂 16 – 18 October @ The Naess, Alcobaca, Portugal
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